Not If I Can Help It by Carolyn Mackler

Author:Carolyn Mackler
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Scholastic Inc.
Published: 2019-09-04T16:00:00+00:00

Ruby isn’t at school on Monday and that’s fine with me. I’m not mad at her but I’m definitely mad at the fact that her mom is marrying my dad. No, actually, I’m a little mad at Ruby too. If she weren’t so excited about their relationship, then maybe our parents wouldn’t have decided to take the next step. Like, Ruby and I could have banded together and opposed the boyfriend-girlfriend thing until they clearly saw it was a terrible idea and returned to being regular parents.

That’s why I haven’t called Ruby to check if she’s sick or to talk over the big news. My dad told me that Ruby knows about the engagement, but I don’t feel like hearing her say how much fun this is going to be and how we’ll have family game nights and things like that. Plus, if Ruby wanted to talk badly enough, she could have called me, and so far I haven’t heard from her.

In addition to being mad at the news in general, I also don’t want to give up my Girl Cave and have to share a room with Benji or with Ruby. And I don’t want Ruby and her mom to move in and bring their lavender-scented soaps into our apartment. I don’t want new smells, new furniture, new foods in the fridge, like soy cheese and lactose-free milk. But mostly I don’t want to hide who I am, all the Private Willa stuff, in my own home.

Oh, and did they even think about the fact that they could get married and it wouldn’t work out and they’d fight all the time and get divorced? Then where would that leave all of us?

I’m not the only one in a bad mood. The whole class is grumpy because of the middle school letters. Kids are drumming their fingers and bending paper clips and fighting for bathroom passes. Norie and Zoe go to the nurse for stomach-aches. They’re nervous because they both want to go to The Tech School—their parents liked the curriculum and they liked all the cute boys they saw on the tour—and they’re freaking out about what happens if one twin gets in and the other doesn’t.

As we’re headed to gym Avery whispers to me, “Don’t you have that girl on Mondays?”

Oh, I’m mad at Avery too. I hate that she was right when—that morning after we found out our parents were dating—she told Ruby and me that my dad and Ruby’s mom looked like they were headed toward marriage when she saw them at the Italian restaurant. If she finds out that her prediction is true, she’ll definitely be rubbing it in.

“What girl?” I ask Avery now as we’re pausing in the hallway while Ms. Lacey tries to get everyone to quiet down.

“You don’t remember?” she asks, rolling her eyes like I’m stupid. “That kindergarten girl you go to therapy with!”

I stare at my feet, my cheeks burning. Why is it that I never have a comeback when

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